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Old September 5th, 2005 #1
Stronza
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Default "Enmeshment" - latest psychological illness in children

Have a look at this: http://www.newswithviews.com/Vaughan/tricia.htm
 
Old September 6th, 2005 #2
Alex Linder
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Good catch, first time I've heard of that. She makes a good point re CPS: they by law must investigate all complaints, and the complaints can be lodged anonymously. Next time you're at a family gathering, ask your relatives who teach what they think about homeschooling.
 
Old September 6th, 2005 #3
Antiochus Epiphanes
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Wow. I'd like to see some of the wonkish stuff about this socalled enmeshment being pathological. Attachment of the child to parents is a most wonderful and natural thing, and anybody who finds it abnormal, must be a freak themselves.
 
Old September 6th, 2005 #4
Border Ruffian
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The concerned parent as abuser, guilty of care and involvement. hahah that's the ultimate for these people. Must be their holy grail, to get that term widely accepted for describing parent-child relationships. Guilty of neglect by not being neglectful. Full-circle black-as-white. If i was a kike I'd get a hard-on.

http://www.abacon.com/famtherapy/minuchin.html
Quote:
This compelling man with the elegant Latin accent would provoke, seduce, bully, or bewilder families into changing.
Heheh yeah that's the sport. Of course they only use their powers for "good" What's the opposite of "enmeshment" I wonder?

Pardon the tangent but here's an article where the writer is trying to resurrect a Kaplan's term, originally describing congo-bongo niggers' antics in their old world, for use in describing the New Orleans situation. http://www.nysun.com/article/19620

"re-primitivized man". Blacks aren't "primitive", they're being forced back down into that state by whitey, republicans, what have you.

Quote:
Wow. I'd like to see some of the wonkish stuff about this socalled enmeshment being pathological. Attachment of the child to parents is a most wonderful and natural thing, and anybody who finds it abnormal, must be a freak themselves.
Here's some, first google hit for "enmeshment": http://www.soulselfhelp.on.ca/coenmesh.html
Quote:
"Enmeshment doesn't allow for individuality, wholeness, personal empowerment, healthy relationships with ourselves or others, and, most importantly, a relationship with our Higher Power."
Damn... caring for your kids and being involved will wreck your life or even get in the way of GOD! By "higher power" they mean god, right?

Last edited by Border Ruffian; September 6th, 2005 at 04:04 PM.
 
Old September 6th, 2005 #5
Border Ruffian
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It describes how the psychological industry makes every damn discomfort into a pathological condition requiring - bien sur - THEIR treatment.
Just like government, which this is a form of or will at least be enmeshed with.

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Second, I imagine that there really is such a pathological state of mind that might be described as "enmeshment", but that is not what a healthy, close, dependent parent-child relationship is. Fer chrissake, the kids are supposed to be dependent.
Ditto and bingo. Common sense that you should be as involved as possible, at least into the teens when they can control some things for themselves. How well the teenager does with that will depend mainly on how well you nurtured them up to that point. Your care and their future good are totally enmeshed, totally co-dependant. It's so basic and obvious.
 
Old September 8th, 2005 #6
Mike
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Great article. I notice that "enmeshment" has something in common with Freud's Oedipus complex theory, namely it casts suspicion on close parent-child bonding.

Another great observation made in the article regards the total obsession with being "normal" and the faith placed in the opinions of experts promising to deliver "normality".

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stronza
I like this quote:

Quote:
Holt’s other gems included that parents should not rock a baby because it is ‘useless and sometimes injurious’ . . . and he maintained that “under no circumstances should a child be allowed to sleep in its mother’s bed.” Sage advice against the centuries in which families had been sleeping together. But Holt’s advice, along with that of psychiatrists who complained about the then-newly-fangled Oedipus and Electra complex, permeated the mind of the masses. As a result, parents began physically and emotionally separating themselves from their children as early as possible. Americans, egged on by advice from the so-called experts, heeded all kinds of advice, fearing that not doing so would produce some kind of abnormal child. Being normal was what the psychiatric community preached and more than just the choir were listening. Common sense told the parents to listen to their instinct, but the experts won.

Feat accomplished, it then became much easier to separate children from their mom so that mom could work away from their home and family all day, a boon for the industrial society and a bust for families. And we see a century of results today: The experts tell us that it’s good for our children if we’re away from them for eight or nine hours each day, taking those hours for our own trivial pursuits. Raising children is not nearly the intellectual exercise that working for a corporation or a government entity is, according to the post-modern mom, who is fully trained in the idea that anyone can raise her child better than she. Some moms teach other children in public schools, but pawn their own child off to a daycare worker. It’s okay though, because we’re teaching our children to be independent, whatever that vague definition means. Our society refuses to believe that children actually need their true mom and dad, as infants and toddlers and even beyond.
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Old September 27th, 2005 #7
einzelwesen...
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Sick...

They mention the CPS, and on that note I must say; I do think a parent should be allowed to smack their kids on reasonable grounds, because I would be pretty uncivilised if my parents haven't 'reprimanded' me in such a way when I was a kid.

But if my parents hadn't also given me a certain degree of freedom, I would have turned out like everyone else in ways that aren't a good thing; having a tendency not to take (most) people's words for things, for example, which is probably the best survival trait I ever acquired.

But, anyone, ANYONE who thinks a parent should be allowed to smack their kids to the point of injury, pretty much deserves to be skinned and thrown down a water-tube full of envenomed razor-blades. I am quite serious. In an ideal world, that's what would happen to rock spiders as well.

But what powers, exactly, do CPS have in your country? Does it vary from state to state, or is it legislated federally...???
 
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